I <3 this and wish there were more places to share it.
This touches on some of the reasons that I've finally stopped calling myself a feminist.
I was steered away from math and science while growing up because "girls are supposed to be good at language arts and boys are supposed to be good at math." THAT is oppression...and it was done to me *by* the state/government in the form of public school teachers. My parents were the ones who told the school to Stop It Right Now. So seeing so-called feminists run to the state for protection drives me crazy, because the state will only protect girls for as long as it benefits the state.
The same is true of any interest, public or private, group or individual. Its protection and advocacy ends where its goals do. Given that, it's incumbent upon everyone, male AND female, to recognize and be ready to act for one's own protection. But that requires growing up and accepting responsibility for it.
Most of the other reasons I've finally rejected feminism have to do with the feminist movement's attempts to redefine gender, as you mention. It's interesting to note that the feminist definition of "what's good for women" is remarkably masculine.
As an example, rather than celebrating the uniquely female ability to bear children, modern feminism buys into the patriarchy's myth that fertility is a disease (why else would birth control be considered "preventive medicine" for women but not for men?) and pregnancy is an abnormal condition. In addition, women who go into traditionally female careers are attacked for "selling out" and traditionally female interests such as hair and makeup are considered "frivolous" and "shallow" pursuits of time to the modern feminist (girls should be more interested in sports because physical activity is good for you).
This isn't the definition of gender equality that I signed up for, and it's the reason I finally left the movement. For that, too, I got attacked: I'd supposedly given in to the patriarchy.
We won't even get into the fact that the men's rights movement actually has a number of valid points. I'd be drummed right out of my own gender if I admitted that despite the fact that I've SEEN some of those allegations actually happen in real life, including in my own family.
That's not what I signed up for either; I don't need to oppress men in order to gain my own freedom as a woman. That, too, is something feminists need to take responsibility for. We all need help and advocacy sometimes, and pretending that only women have been victimized is deplorable. Of course, recognizing that means recognizing that sometimes, a woman really isn't a victim...and what good feminist would do that?
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This touches on some of the reasons that I've finally stopped calling myself a feminist.
I was steered away from math and science while growing up because "girls are supposed to be good at language arts and boys are supposed to be good at math." THAT is oppression...and it was done to me *by* the state/government in the form of public school teachers. My parents were the ones who told the school to Stop It Right Now. So seeing so-called feminists run to the state for protection drives me crazy, because the state will only protect girls for as long as it benefits the state.
The same is true of any interest, public or private, group or individual. Its protection and advocacy ends where its goals do. Given that, it's incumbent upon everyone, male AND female, to recognize and be ready to act for one's own protection. But that requires growing up and accepting responsibility for it.
Most of the other reasons I've finally rejected feminism have to do with the feminist movement's attempts to redefine gender, as you mention. It's interesting to note that the feminist definition of "what's good for women" is remarkably masculine.
As an example, rather than celebrating the uniquely female ability to bear children, modern feminism buys into the patriarchy's myth that fertility is a disease (why else would birth control be considered "preventive medicine" for women but not for men?) and pregnancy is an abnormal condition. In addition, women who go into traditionally female careers are attacked for "selling out" and traditionally female interests such as hair and makeup are considered "frivolous" and "shallow" pursuits of time to the modern feminist (girls should be more interested in sports because physical activity is good for you).
This isn't the definition of gender equality that I signed up for, and it's the reason I finally left the movement. For that, too, I got attacked: I'd supposedly given in to the patriarchy.
We won't even get into the fact that the men's rights movement actually has a number of valid points. I'd be drummed right out of my own gender if I admitted that despite the fact that I've SEEN some of those allegations actually happen in real life, including in my own family.
That's not what I signed up for either; I don't need to oppress men in order to gain my own freedom as a woman. That, too, is something feminists need to take responsibility for. We all need help and advocacy sometimes, and pretending that only women have been victimized is deplorable. Of course, recognizing that means recognizing that sometimes, a woman really isn't a victim...and what good feminist would do that?